Cruise Control
5/31/05
Since I work for a living, I do not watch any day time television at all. I remember when Oprah first started out, back in the 1980s, but can honestly say over all these years I have seen maybe 30 minutes total of her show.
However, I do read the newspapers every day which, needless to say, have mentioned her schtick from time to time. “Oprah gave away a car,” “Oprah lost weight,” “Oprah gained weight,” etc. etc.
So, when I stumbled across these pictures of the appearance movie star Tom Cruise made on her show the other day, I sat transfixed, dumbfounded really, trying with all my might to figure out what they meant. Take a look if you dare.
I reiterate:
Yeah...
He doesn't take it in the ass.
Sixth Army
Since I work for a living, I do not watch any day time television at all. I remember when Oprah first started out, back in the 1980s, but can honestly say over all these years I have seen maybe 30 minutes total of her show.
However, I do read the newspapers every day which, needless to say, have mentioned her schtick from time to time. “Oprah gave away a car,” “Oprah lost weight,” “Oprah gained weight,” etc. etc.
So, when I stumbled across these pictures of the appearance movie star Tom Cruise made on her show the other day, I sat transfixed, dumbfounded really, trying with all my might to figure out what they meant. Take a look if you dare.
Just look at this shit.
An incredible display of overcompensation
...and what exactly is this?
I reiterate:
WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?!?!
Yeah...
He doesn't take it in the ass.
Sixth Army
posted by Larry B | 10:31 AM
2 Comments:
OOOOOOOOOOH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
You left out the picture of Oprah ruffling Tom's hair!!! That little action was particularly vomitous.
I started watching this show but Cruise began to annoy me so much with his ridicuous antics, I had to turn it off. I've heard over the years that he's gay, not that it makes a difference to me one way or the other, but I do wonder why a healthy, suppposedly hetero woman like Katie Holmes, and Nicole Kidman before her, would marry a may who either can't, or won't, have sex with them? Is it all a publicity stunt?
Not so much of a publicity stunt but more like an official "Beard." Tom is so obsessed with his image he is going to such extreme lengths that it is almost admirable the way he is sticking to his guns.
As far as Kidman (and now Holmes) marrying him, ask yourself what was Nicole before she hooked up with Cruise? A B actress trying to "make it" in American movies. I remember seeing her in a ridiculous movie where she was playing second banana to Esai Morales for Christ sake. Now she is A-List making millions per picture.
Unfortunately for Katie, who undoubtedly had the same path in mind, this stuff has gone so over the top that it is backfiring on her. While Kidman and Cruise was "public" (Think that awful movie Far and Away) it was still low key and believable.
This, on the other hand, is a complete farce with only the people who were "shocked" when Rosie O'Donnell and Jim J Bullock came out of the closetleft believing any of it.
But, mark my words, she is going to end up pregnant real soon because Tom is going to want to kick it up a notch, but the kid will not be conceived naturally.
Of course that information will not become common knowledge until years later when Katie realizes she cut a deal with the devil and fame was not worth her soul.
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