The Berg Is Back In Town

11/9/2005

So the election results are in: Bloomberg buys a landslide!!!

There was no real surprise in this outcome. Most people look at Bloomberg as a no-nonsense guy who is not doing a bad job so why change horses? Certainly, nobody gave the voters any reason to.

Mayor Michael Bloomberg

I, personally, was resigned to another four years of Shit-Berg once the Democrats put up that meat-puppet Ferrer a man the party machine bosses had the audacity to call a viable candidate. Maybe Ferrer is popular in the back rooms of smoky “social clubs” where the only civic things going on are sleazy pay-offs to bought-and-paid-for local councilmen, “No-Limit Hold-Um” tournaments involving bosses with their bank rolls made up of union pension fund money and, of course, robust cock fights. But to the general electorate who don’t have fancy “no-show” or “show/no-work” jobs, he was a complete bust out.

But yet, about three in the morning, I found myself laying in bed, staring at the shadow play dancing upon my ceiling with the only sounds in the room being the garbled nonsensical static of late night all-sports-talk radio crackling out of my antiquated clock/tuner…and my inconsolable weeping.

I was trying to figure out just exactly how I fucked up my life.

I kept asking myself, over and over again, when was that precise moment, what was that specific decision or indecision that I made or didn’t make that produced results like this? How could I have avoided the fate that finds me in a cube, financially decimated, completely enslaved by The Man, socially alienated from a society that makes little or no sense to me and, most importantly, feeling there are no prospects on the horizon that would make me believe that the situation will ever change? My night was, yet again, devolving into a paralyzing introspective nightmare, complete with large doses of guilt, shame and anger. In these bouts, too frequent as of late, with insomnia, helpless and hopeless are recurring themes. One I am trying to unsuccessfully avoid.

In between the loud bawling, the uncontrollable shaking and the serious dissertations on the New York Football Giants, I, for some reason, began to smile. Against all odds, all of a sudden, something became very clear to me. I stopped feeling sorry for myself and realized that there is at least one thing I can feel hopeful about. That one thing is the role of Religion in modern day society.

WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!

That's right. Religion.

No, I did not find Jesus in my despair and despondencynor have I met Allah, Jehovah, Odin or Zeus either. And, before you jump to any conclussions, I have not lost my sanity.

So get them panties out of your crack and listen up and let me explain.

Although this Mayoral election was a sick twisted joke, a mock-fest to anybody who has any sense of what a Democracy could and should be, there is one thing that I can look at with a great deal of pride. Not once did the subject of belief in Jesus Christ as our Savior come up. Not once was Bloomberg asked to expound on his “personal relationship” with the Son of God or how he believes “faith” has to be factored into civic duty.

BRAVO!!!

And this has nothing to do with the fact that Bloomy is Jewish so obviously has no relationship with the carpenter who died 2000 years ago because Ferrer, a Roman Catholic, did not make it a theme either. No big deal, right?

Wrong.

Think about any election campaign that has any kind of national significance. Think about how much wheel spinning and placating to religious nuts and fanatics goes on. Clowns like John Kerry, an obviously intelligent man, feels as if he had to be in a Church photo-op while he discussed foreign policy and gun control. Both the Democratic and Republican conventions were loaded with speeches peppered with slogans like “With God’s help,” “God on our side,” and “God Bless America.”

If it is a national election, we have to witness the ridiculous spectacle of a hateful, misanthropic, misogynistic little man like Pat Robertson being treated like a statesman and a “Man of God” instead of the straight-up asshole that he really is.

In a national election, we have to actually debate and discuss the idea of teaching Creationism over Evolution seriously instead of pointing out that the “controversy” is completely ridiculous and that anyone wanting to teach Creationism as Science is truly stupid just because we don’t want to offend anyone.

And before you start saying that the rest of the country is more religious than New York City I say think again Kemosabe. I believe the actual “faith” in these religious beliefs has absolutely nothing to do with the character of our local elections as compared to the local elections in Bubble-Slam, Tennessee. I believe it is New York’s cosmopolitan tradition that makes our elections usually devoid of crass religious piety.

To say that this city is not religious is a fantasy. There are HUGE pockets of hardcore faithful of every major religion on this planet living in the five boroughs. I personally know at least three Bush type born agains, two Mel Gibson strict Roman Catholics, three “got to get home before sun down” Jews, two reincarnation Buddhists and one Koran reading Muslim. And I don’t even get out much!

What do all these New Yorkers I mention have in common?

Their FAITH, a word thrown around in this nation pretty damn regularly by people who usually want to fuck you over, is actually strong and internal. They have no need to convince you of anything. They seek validation of their beliefs from within and not through others. Their FAITH goes beyond telling others whose cock they can suck or what movies they can or can not see or what books are allowed or disallowed.

In other words, they truly understand the the core American principle of the Separation of Church and State.

So what I am grateful for is the fact that I live in New York City. A place that is loaded with corruption, graft and slime but a place that is also a beacon of hope, an example of enlightenment in a rapidly dimming land. A land being enveloped by hatred, willful ignorance and fear. A city that exemplifies the simple truth:

Religous freedom of worship will thrive under a secular government and can not exist under a religious one.

Hell...Just trying to be positive.


Larry